Yesterday night I found out that my best friend is getting engaged next year. I cried.
Feelings: Happy and sad.
- he found ‘the one’
- that girl is perfect for him
- they would be so happy together
- from now on, I have to refrain myself from ranting to him about my life because that is what I do when I’m feeling upset with stuffs, I confide in him.
- all these years I’ve been so comfortable with the fact that no matter how hard life hit me, I’d still be able to bounce back and will be way stronger than before because he is and will always be there to give me the best advice in the world. He’s one of my pillar of strength. But now, I don’t have that kind of luxury anymore. Come on, would you like it if a girl comes and whine to your fiancee/husband about what’s going on with her life? Errr, no.
- the thing with him is, he’s the most matured man I’ve ever met. And I don’t retaliate when he advises me. He was the one who got me out of misery after what my stupid ex did. He was the one who taught me to be a braver, smarter and stronger person.
- I am scared. But I know he’s gonna go away someday. But I didn’t think it’ll be this fast.
Don’t get me wrong, I LOVE my boyfriend very much. The thing is, I haven’t learn to be fully emotionally dependant on my bf yet. Why? Let’s just say we both met each other at a time where we didn’t know what to do and haven’t figured out who we are in our lives yet. There are still very much tweaking to do in our lives. (Tweaking involves quarrelling, not trusting, immature arguments, etc. Of course, there are many good things we are experiencing also) Therefore, sometimes, I feel like my bf isn’t ready to hear my rant like how my best friend does.
But it’s ok, dear friend. All those advice and encouragements you gave me will not go to waste. I know I’ll be ok. I just need to get things off my chest.
To my bf, I love you very much ok? I’ll learn to trust you more.
To my best friend, I wish the both of you all the best in your lives. God bless.
To God, thanks for sending 3 Ks into my life. The 1st one, almost ruined my life. The 2nd one, helped me got through the darkest times after what the 1st one did. And the 3rd one, taught me how to love again and he is now, the 1st in my heart.